Imagine having an intimate conversation with someone you love. Now imagine how that conversation would occur without speaking, or even writing. Imagine finding someone you’d very much like to know better. Suppose they’re interested in you as well. Imagine getting that relationship off the ground without using words of any kind.
That was the situation in 1800’s Victorian England. They had a very strict etiquette. Extreme discretion was demanded at all times. Romantic conversations, even in a whisper or in writing, were off-limits. Emotional expression however, will not be denied. People soon found ways around the rules as they attached hidden meanings to many otherwise normal gestures and objects. Flowers in particular were given special meanings.
Specific meanings were given to every variety and color of flower. As a result, a bouquet of flowers could become a secret message. In addition, the way the flowers were presented, the way they were accepted also added special meanings. Many of the secret messages were romantic, but some were rejections and some were even insults. Complete conversations could be carried on using only flowers.
Tussie-mussies, small bouquets of flowers, became very popular. Using the language of flowers, Victorians developed secret messages that declared their intentions, issued rejections, and made acceptances. Emotions that were forbidden in speech or writing could now be expressed in flowers.
As the symbolism grew more complex, many details of the secret codes were written down. Eventually dictionaries and even books were written to clarify the meanings and to help people better create and understand the messages.
Over time, many cultures have used flowers to express emotions. The Greeks, Persians and the Japanese, for example, have all created their own flower language. The meanings change to fit the need of the specific culture but the need to express emotions with flowers has continued to this day.
Many cultures had elaborate and lengthy courtship rituals. The giving and receiving of flowers was often an important part of the process. Those practices led to the prominent place of flowers in our modern culture. Valentines Day, Mothers Day, and Easter, among others, simply wouldn’t be the same celebrations without flowers and plants.
Like the Victorians, we still use flowers to express our emotions. Unlike them, our messages are typically much simpler. For Valentine’s Day this year, instead of sending a simple message, try a bouquet of mixed flowers for a message full of hidden meaning. Search online for “language of flowers” for some great ideas. Be sure to add a note to the bouquet to explain the deeper message. Don’t forget to order your Valentine’s flowers early to ensure a timely delivery.
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